The easiest way to keep the conversation going is to ask her open-ended questions. i.e. questions that can't be answered with a simple 'yes' or 'no.'
Example: If you meet someone who's just leaving a restaurant, it's better to ask "Hey, what's good in there?" which requires a little thought on her part… instead of asking, "Hey, is this a good restaurant?" to which she can reply "yes" or "no" and the conversation can easily die there (unless you follow up with an open-ended question.)
In the pickup example I gave earlier, I used a few ways to get the woman's attention. Let's take a closer look at what I did…
Me: (Smiling) You know, for some odd reason, I just knew you had to have a great sense of humor, despite the fact that you are attractive.
Her: (Smiling now) Oh yeah? And how did you know that? (Said in a challenging tone?)
I said "I just knew you had to have a great sense of humor" which made her curious about how or why I knew that. And it worked. Not only did I have her interested and curious, I even had her asking me questions and "volunteering" to continue the conversation.
I also said, "despite the fact that you are attractive."
That little statement above said a lot of things. The main message was that "I was unique" because… even though I thought she was attractive, I was interested in more than just how good she looked. I wanted to see if she had a sense of humor.
Then, I said…
Me: Actually, I thought there was a good chance you'd be like most attractive women who think they're better than everyone else. But I really wanted to talk about high-heels today which is why I still decided to talk to you. (said in a playful tongue-in-cheek manner.)
Even though I said the above in a playful manner, the message was clear: that most attractive women can be so into their looks that they think they have a license to treat others like crap.
But there's something even more powerful that I did above. I also "challenged" her to be different from most other attractive women. Now she would want to "prove" to me that she wasn't like those other women, that she was more evolved. In other words, I gave her a reputation to live up to!
Important: When you challenge her as directly as I did, you have to do it in a playful way. Or… you have to be less direct with the statement you use.
I then further challenged her by saying "But the "real" question is… what kind of a "woman" are you?" which also created more interest and intrigue… and then I followed it up with… "I'm interested in finding out IF you possess other admirable qualities, aside from the sense of humor thing." which was another challenge combined with a compliment which would require her to "prove" to me that she actually had more good qualities.
Do you see how this works, and how powerful it can be?Tags: Saturday Night Live, attractive women, the conversation, sense of humor <BR/>
Sense of humor is a very attractive quality. In both men and women.
Have a sense of humor and keep the entire conversation/interaction light and easygoing. However, don't be goofy. I see many guys trying to be funny and they're just trying so hard that they start looking goofy, and even desperate.
Don't force humor. Just be relaxed and come from a "playful" frame of mind.
If humor doesn't come easy to you, think of some funny stories, openers and/or one-liners ahead of time and make mental notes of them. There's nothing wrong with that. (Prepare ahead of time, remember?)
A great way to develop a good sense of humor is to start watching comedy, either TV shows or movies.
If you can get a woman to laugh within the first 10 seconds of meeting her, you'll be able to melt away most of her fears and walls that she puts up as soon as she feels she's being hit on.
I know a guy who saw this woman sitting at the bar. So, he walked up to her, sat right next to her, held up a napkin and said, "Hey, I'd like to draw a life-like portrait of you right now."
The woman was taken back a bit and all she could say was, "Uh…"
For that second, the guy had her attention!
Guy: Come on, it will only take a minute.
Woman: Well… OK.
The guy then puts a serious look on his face and starts to draw on the napkin, using his other hand to hide the drawing from her. After a few seconds, he hands the napkin to her.
The woman takes one look at the drawing and starts laughing out loudly. The guy had drawn a stick figure of a woman on the napkin.
Pretty clever way to break the ice, huh? And, the "shared laughter" between them got the conversation going. He did something unique that most guys probably haven't even thought of, which got him extra points.Tags: a sense of humor, Magazines and E-zines, sense of humor, Television program <BR/>
So, the first step to seduction is to get their attention. If they aren't aware of your existence, you're not going to get anywhere with them.
How do you get someone's attention? By being 'different', unique, and maybe even a little outrageous.
Most guys are never able to get a woman's attention simply because they do the same ol' things that guys have been doing for decades… the same ol' things that have consistently not worked on women.
Women can see all of that stuff coming from a mile away. They have been exposed to this stuff on almost a daily basis, since they were 12 years old. And, believe it or not, from "their" point of view, the stuff most men try to use to pick them up are not much different from the stuff boys used to try to pick them up when they were 12! Scary, huh?
Men will use the same old pickup lines that they've been using all their life, even when they know that it absolutely doesn't work! They are stuck! Women have heard just about every line that you've gotten from your friends or from the movies.
So, your job, if you want to succeed with women, is to get her attention by doing the exact opposite of what most men do.
Be "unique," different, and maybe even a little outrageous. If you don't do that, in her mind you'll just be another boring guy who's trying to get into her pants by using cheesy and lame lines.
To be unique, just ask yourself one question… "What would the average guy do when trying to approach a woman… and how can I be unique and different in my approach?"
Here are a few ways to be unique:
DON'T comment on her "physical beauty." If you do, you have to follow it up with some kind of a "challenge." Also, since most guys can't think of anything else to comment on aside from her good looks, it's even more important for you to do the opposite of what they do, i.e. do not comment on her looks or physical attributes at all!
Do or Say Something Outrageous or Funny. Most guys will start with something along the lines of… "Hi, uh… I just wanted to say that you are very beautiful and…uh, I was wondering if… if maybe you'd like to go out sometime?"
Or, the other extreme is... "Hey baby, you look really great today. How about I get your number so we can get together later?"
It's old, it's dull, it's boring. It's no wonder women rarely respond to that. That just doesn't get their attention because they're so used to hearing similar stuff all the time. And if they do respond to something like that, it will probably be because she's had a rough day and needs a brush to her ego. She may lead you on just so she can feel a little better about herself for the rest of the day. (Yes, there are women out there who enjoy doing just that.)
One of the best ways to 'really' get her attention is to show her that you're paying attention to more than just her "physical" attributes, i.e. her body and looks.
In the pickup example, I gave towards the beginning of this section, I noticed the woman's high heels and the noise they were making, and I used that instead of saying something about how great she looked.
I then took that piece of information and decided to say something funny about it. You can do the same. Notice what she's wearing, any interesting jewelry or accessory that stands out, and so on.
You can also do something a little more outrageous, but not too outrageous or it will appear a bit creepy.
Example: Go up to her and say "I'm sorry I'm late, I hope I haven't kept you waiting for too long."
Something like that will make her stop for a second, even if that second is made up of confusion. It will "get her attention."
Once you have that, you can then follow up with something funny. Or, you can just admit that you were messing with her just to see what kind of reaction you would get out of her.Tags: Human physical appearance, pickup line, pickup lines <BR/>